1 00:00:09,792 --> 00:00:13,295 Ronaldo: Beach City -- a sleepy seaside town. 2 00:00:13,297 --> 00:00:15,998 From far away, it looks ordinary, 3 00:00:16,000 --> 00:00:17,466 but take a closer look, 4 00:00:17,468 --> 00:00:22,037 and you'll start to notice the cracks in the facade. 5 00:00:22,039 --> 00:00:24,306 [ News theme plays ] 6 00:00:24,308 --> 00:00:25,641 My name is -- 7 00:00:25,643 --> 00:00:27,309 uh... 8 00:00:27,311 --> 00:00:28,377 [ Clears throat ] 9 00:00:28,379 --> 00:00:30,212 My name is Ronaldo. 10 00:00:30,214 --> 00:00:34,316 For years, I've run a blog called "keep Beach City weird." 11 00:00:34,318 --> 00:00:37,219 My mission -- keep Beach City weird! 12 00:00:37,221 --> 00:00:40,022 And also to expose the truth. 13 00:00:40,024 --> 00:00:44,459 Most people choose to ignore my mind-blowing revelations. 14 00:00:44,461 --> 00:00:47,729 But no one could deny it when the truth 15 00:00:47,731 --> 00:00:52,367 was pointing right in the town's collective face. 16 00:00:52,369 --> 00:00:53,402 [ Ronaldo gasps ] 17 00:00:53,404 --> 00:00:54,836 It's an invasion! 18 00:00:54,838 --> 00:00:57,539 Look at that thing! It's right there! 19 00:00:57,541 --> 00:01:00,742 Beach City needed to be saved. 20 00:01:00,744 --> 00:01:02,578 But from what? 21 00:01:02,580 --> 00:01:05,214 Duhm! Duhm! Duhm! 22 00:01:13,223 --> 00:01:16,525 Eh, I was just cleaning up some fish for a very big order 23 00:01:16,527 --> 00:01:17,759 when it happened. 24 00:01:17,761 --> 00:01:20,395 I felt this very peculiar rumbling, 25 00:01:20,397 --> 00:01:23,532 like, "boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom, boom!" 26 00:01:23,534 --> 00:01:25,834 And then a sonic boom! 27 00:01:25,836 --> 00:01:27,402 And the fish I was preparing 28 00:01:27,404 --> 00:01:29,738 flew up into the air and fell on the ground. 29 00:01:31,541 --> 00:01:32,741 I ran outside and saw 30 00:01:32,743 --> 00:01:35,177 this great big thing in the sky. 31 00:01:35,179 --> 00:01:37,846 The town was under attack! 32 00:01:37,848 --> 00:01:39,214 What is this for, again? 33 00:01:39,216 --> 00:01:40,716 It's a web-sclusive for my bl-- 34 00:01:40,718 --> 00:01:43,385 oh. Uh, yes. That day was crazy. 35 00:01:43,387 --> 00:01:45,387 The mayor said -- Ronaldo: Were you scared?! 36 00:01:45,389 --> 00:01:46,722 What?! No! 37 00:01:46,724 --> 00:01:48,724 I wasn't -- I was just concerned 38 00:01:48,726 --> 00:01:51,226 that something bad would happen to the shop. 39 00:01:51,228 --> 00:01:52,561 So you cried a lot? 40 00:01:52,563 --> 00:01:54,196 I don't know what you're talking about. 41 00:01:54,198 --> 00:01:55,564 [ Crying ] Let it go! 42 00:01:55,566 --> 00:01:57,733 Dad, no! [ Crying ] [ Grunts ] 43 00:01:57,735 --> 00:01:59,735 Please, no! [ Grunts ] 44 00:01:59,737 --> 00:02:02,404 I was under a lot of stress at the time! 45 00:02:02,406 --> 00:02:03,438 [ Groans ] 46 00:02:03,440 --> 00:02:04,706 Aww. Hey. 47 00:02:04,708 --> 00:02:05,707 What? 48 00:02:05,709 --> 00:02:07,242 I'm here for you, bro. 49 00:02:07,244 --> 00:02:08,443 Mmmm. 50 00:02:08,445 --> 00:02:10,279 [ Muffled ] I'm fine! Let me go! 51 00:02:10,281 --> 00:02:12,581 You can't make up drama this good! 52 00:02:12,583 --> 00:02:14,116 Ronaldo: With the space hand closing in 53 00:02:14,118 --> 00:02:16,151 for a high-five of the third kind, 54 00:02:16,153 --> 00:02:17,786 we fled the town. 55 00:02:17,788 --> 00:02:21,390 But then, just as mysteriously as the space hand appeared, 56 00:02:21,392 --> 00:02:23,925 it exploded into an explosion. 57 00:02:23,927 --> 00:02:25,927 [ Explosion ] What in blue blazes was that?! 58 00:02:25,929 --> 00:02:27,763 I think it was an explosion. 59 00:02:27,765 --> 00:02:29,264 Ronaldo: Unbelievable. 60 00:02:29,266 --> 00:02:30,899 I missed it! 61 00:02:30,901 --> 00:02:32,467 There's no actual footage 62 00:02:32,469 --> 00:02:35,270 of the giant hand thing crashing into the beach, 63 00:02:35,272 --> 00:02:37,606 but here's a little re-enactment for you. 64 00:02:37,608 --> 00:02:40,742 Whoooooooooa! 65 00:02:40,744 --> 00:02:42,311 Pfff! Whah! 66 00:02:42,313 --> 00:02:43,779 Ouch. Ouch, ouch, ouch. 67 00:02:43,781 --> 00:02:45,814 Aaah! [ Inhales sharply ] My hand! Aah-- 68 00:02:45,816 --> 00:02:48,283 Beach City was saved. 69 00:02:48,285 --> 00:02:49,918 But by whom? 70 00:02:49,920 --> 00:02:51,820 Ronaldo: Miss! Huh? 71 00:02:51,822 --> 00:02:53,655 Who do you think saved Beach City 72 00:02:53,657 --> 00:02:55,457 from the giant hand craft? 73 00:02:55,459 --> 00:02:57,659 Oh. Hey, Ronaldo. 74 00:02:57,661 --> 00:02:59,261 Wait. A-- are you filming? 75 00:02:59,263 --> 00:03:00,662 Please answer the question. 76 00:03:00,664 --> 00:03:03,265 Oh. Okay. Um, yeah, sure. 77 00:03:03,267 --> 00:03:04,533 Who saved us? 78 00:03:04,535 --> 00:03:07,636 Um, well, wasn't it Steven's...Family? 79 00:03:07,638 --> 00:03:09,705 I-I think they pretty much keep to themselves. 80 00:03:09,707 --> 00:03:12,207 Steven says they protect the planet and the human race 81 00:03:12,209 --> 00:03:14,643 [ store bell chimes ] And that they have magic powers. 82 00:03:14,645 --> 00:03:15,977 It sounds hard to believe, 83 00:03:15,979 --> 00:03:18,447 but I've seen some pretty wild stuff. 84 00:03:18,449 --> 00:03:20,282 Once, they made us hamburgers, 85 00:03:20,284 --> 00:03:21,817 and we were having a pretty good time. 86 00:03:21,819 --> 00:03:24,720 But then we were attacked by a huge creature. 87 00:03:24,722 --> 00:03:26,688 Hey! You making a movie? 88 00:03:26,690 --> 00:03:28,490 Oh, let him be. 89 00:03:28,492 --> 00:03:31,393 Ronaldo: It's a docu-web-umentary about The Crystal Gems. 90 00:03:31,395 --> 00:03:33,662 [ Scoffs ] They are c-ra-zy. 91 00:03:33,664 --> 00:03:36,465 One of them tried to knock me in the face. 92 00:03:36,467 --> 00:03:37,833 I ain't mad, though. 93 00:03:37,835 --> 00:03:40,202 Ronaldo: Mayor Dewey, who do you think 94 00:03:40,204 --> 00:03:42,404 saved Beach City from the hand craft? 95 00:03:42,406 --> 00:03:44,406 Why, young man, I credit the voters 96 00:03:44,408 --> 00:03:45,841 with saving Beach City. 97 00:03:45,843 --> 00:03:47,743 My constituents know they've elected a mayor 98 00:03:47,745 --> 00:03:49,311 whom they can trust to -- 99 00:03:49,313 --> 00:03:51,213 huh? No, I'm talking about The Crystal Gems. 100 00:03:51,215 --> 00:03:52,647 [ Laughs nervously ] W-why? 101 00:03:52,649 --> 00:03:54,383 Well, I'm covering the story. 102 00:03:54,385 --> 00:03:56,017 Cover-up?! What cover-up?! 103 00:03:56,019 --> 00:03:57,686 But, mayor -- security! 104 00:03:57,688 --> 00:04:00,689 H-hey! You can't suppress the truth! 105 00:04:00,691 --> 00:04:04,226 Obviously, The Crystal Gems were involved, 106 00:04:04,228 --> 00:04:07,529 even at the highest levels of local government. 107 00:04:07,531 --> 00:04:10,265 I decided to go to the source. 108 00:04:10,267 --> 00:04:12,534 Right now, I'm standi-- 109 00:04:12,536 --> 00:04:14,035 peedee: Speak up! 110 00:04:14,037 --> 00:04:17,339 [ Echoing ] Right now, I'm standing directly below 111 00:04:17,341 --> 00:04:20,008 the fortress of The Crystal Gems! 112 00:04:20,010 --> 00:04:23,245 I am now going to attempt to make contact 113 00:04:23,247 --> 00:04:26,615 with the mysterious, reclusive, and -- 114 00:04:26,617 --> 00:04:28,350 aah! Hi, Ronaldo. 115 00:04:28,352 --> 00:04:30,385 Uh, hi, peedee. Is that a camera? 116 00:04:30,387 --> 00:04:32,254 Peedee: Yeah. We're making a movie about -- 117 00:04:32,256 --> 00:04:36,458 it's an investigative report, shot camera vérité. 118 00:04:36,460 --> 00:04:38,026 Cool! 119 00:04:38,028 --> 00:04:42,731 So...Want to participate in a groundbreaking interview? 120 00:04:42,733 --> 00:04:43,765 Hmm. 121 00:04:43,767 --> 00:04:45,734 Only if you... 122 00:04:45,736 --> 00:04:49,971 Participate in a glass of fresh-squeezed lemonade! 123 00:04:51,307 --> 00:04:53,708 Ohhh. That giant hand? 124 00:04:53,710 --> 00:04:55,744 It was a spaceship coming to get us. 125 00:04:55,746 --> 00:04:57,779 Us?! I knew it! 126 00:04:57,781 --> 00:05:00,282 Steven, we know too much! 127 00:05:00,284 --> 00:05:01,817 No, not us us. 128 00:05:01,819 --> 00:05:03,885 I-I meant me and The Crystal Gems. 129 00:05:03,887 --> 00:05:06,321 Wait. So the hand wasn't here to snatch up humans 130 00:05:06,323 --> 00:05:07,756 for a human zoo? 131 00:05:07,758 --> 00:05:10,425 Or interfere with our subsidized Beach City wind farm? 132 00:05:10,427 --> 00:05:13,595 Or thaw the cryogenically frozen pets of the one percent?! 133 00:05:13,597 --> 00:05:15,964 Uh... No, I'm pretty sure 134 00:05:15,966 --> 00:05:19,301 it came to Beach City for me and The Crystal Gems. 135 00:05:19,303 --> 00:05:20,602 Oh. 136 00:05:20,604 --> 00:05:24,339 So if you and The Crystal Gems weren't here, 137 00:05:24,341 --> 00:05:27,843 we wouldn't have been attacked by the giant hand? 138 00:05:27,845 --> 00:05:29,945 [ Chuckling ] Ohh. Definitely not. 139 00:05:29,947 --> 00:05:30,946 [ Glass shatters ] 140 00:05:30,948 --> 00:05:32,981 Ronaldo: And there it was. 141 00:05:32,983 --> 00:05:35,617 The Crystal Gems weren't saving us. 142 00:05:35,619 --> 00:05:37,319 They were putting us in danger. 143 00:05:37,321 --> 00:05:38,320 [ Buzzer ] 144 00:05:38,322 --> 00:05:40,355 I felt I had no choice 145 00:05:40,357 --> 00:05:42,958 but to lay bare this ugly truth 146 00:05:42,960 --> 00:05:45,994 to the unwitting citizens of Beach City. 147 00:05:45,996 --> 00:05:47,429 Ronaldo: Ma'am! [ Gasps ] 148 00:05:47,431 --> 00:05:48,930 Are you aware that The Crystal Gems 149 00:05:48,932 --> 00:05:50,632 not only saved the town 150 00:05:50,634 --> 00:05:52,601 but also caused the invasion in the first place? 151 00:05:52,603 --> 00:05:55,804 Oh. Well, no more fish are getting knocked out of my hands, 152 00:05:55,806 --> 00:05:57,539 so I'm not complaining. 153 00:05:57,541 --> 00:05:58,807 Ronaldo: Sir! Sir! 154 00:05:58,809 --> 00:06:00,509 How do you feel about The Crystal Gems 155 00:06:00,511 --> 00:06:02,844 attracting an onslaught of dangerous space beings? 156 00:06:02,846 --> 00:06:04,045 Do you feel safe? 157 00:06:04,047 --> 00:06:05,480 [ Gasps ] 158 00:06:05,482 --> 00:06:07,782 Hey! You can't keep quiet forever! 159 00:06:07,784 --> 00:06:11,820 How can you possibly go on, knowing that we are under siege 160 00:06:11,822 --> 00:06:14,956 by forces meant to destroy The Crystal Gems? 161 00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:17,993 How close are you to being done with this project? 162 00:06:17,995 --> 00:06:19,995 Just answer the question, dad! 163 00:06:19,997 --> 00:06:22,898 [ Sighs ] I-I guess it's pretty bad. 164 00:06:22,900 --> 00:06:26,034 But what's a regular guy like me supposed to do about it? 165 00:06:26,036 --> 00:06:27,636 I've got work to do. 166 00:06:27,638 --> 00:06:29,905 And so do you! Put down that camera! 167 00:06:31,507 --> 00:06:33,174 Ronaldo: Everyone was too afraid 168 00:06:33,176 --> 00:06:36,411 to realize they were actually afraid. 169 00:06:36,413 --> 00:06:38,547 Beach City needed a hero. 170 00:06:38,549 --> 00:06:41,850 And that hero would have to be me. 171 00:06:41,852 --> 00:06:42,884 Whoa, whoa -- 172 00:06:42,886 --> 00:06:44,519 okay, everything's ready 173 00:06:44,521 --> 00:06:47,188 for our full-on nighttime stealth coverage. 174 00:06:47,190 --> 00:06:49,024 Peedee: Is it really okay for us to be 175 00:06:49,026 --> 00:06:50,592 lurking around here like this? 176 00:06:50,594 --> 00:06:53,161 We're not lurking! We're investigating! 177 00:06:53,163 --> 00:06:55,564 This is a moment of true bravery. 178 00:06:55,566 --> 00:06:56,998 Are you brave like me? 179 00:06:57,000 --> 00:06:59,100 I'm so brave to be doing this. 180 00:06:59,102 --> 00:07:00,402 Come on! 181 00:07:00,404 --> 00:07:02,671 Amethyst: Aaah! [ Grunts ] 182 00:07:02,673 --> 00:07:03,905 Steven: Aaaah! 183 00:07:03,907 --> 00:07:05,440 Stay back, little bro! 184 00:07:05,442 --> 00:07:06,841 Race you back to the danger zone. 185 00:07:06,843 --> 00:07:08,543 Wait up! Steven! 186 00:07:08,545 --> 00:07:10,679 Uh, hey, Ronaldo. Hey, peedee. 187 00:07:10,681 --> 00:07:12,447 You guys should be careful -- 188 00:07:12,449 --> 00:07:14,215 [ peedee panting ] Cut the pleasantries! 189 00:07:14,217 --> 00:07:16,551 You're all a danger to our city! 190 00:07:16,553 --> 00:07:17,786 What are you talking about? 191 00:07:17,788 --> 00:07:19,454 Garnet: Pearl! Now! 192 00:07:19,456 --> 00:07:21,890 Peedee: Hohhh, my gosh! What the heck is that?! 193 00:07:21,892 --> 00:07:23,625 [ Groans ] Pearl! Now! 194 00:07:23,627 --> 00:07:25,226 Ha! Aim for the eye! 195 00:07:25,228 --> 00:07:26,561 Aye-aye, Garnet. 196 00:07:26,563 --> 00:07:27,729 Where's Amethyst? 197 00:07:27,731 --> 00:07:29,698 Right here! 198 00:07:29,700 --> 00:07:30,899 [ Roars ] 199 00:07:30,901 --> 00:07:32,634 Let's finish the job. 200 00:07:32,636 --> 00:07:36,237 This is exactly the kind of thing I'm talking about, Steven! 201 00:07:36,239 --> 00:07:38,607 But The Crystal Gems are here to help people. 202 00:07:38,609 --> 00:07:41,977 But all the monsters just come here to get you guys 203 00:07:41,979 --> 00:07:44,946 and then wreck things and put us in danger! 204 00:07:44,948 --> 00:07:48,617 Beach City would be way safer if you guys weren't here! 205 00:07:48,619 --> 00:07:49,918 Listen, frybo. 206 00:07:49,920 --> 00:07:52,120 Magic beings are indeed drawn to us, 207 00:07:52,122 --> 00:07:55,757 but we were here long before Beach City even existed. 208 00:07:55,759 --> 00:07:57,759 Who cares how long you've been here?! 209 00:07:57,761 --> 00:07:59,494 Innocent people are in danger 210 00:07:59,496 --> 00:08:01,229 as long as you're hanging around! 211 00:08:01,231 --> 00:08:03,798 You're right. I guess we'll just leave, then. 212 00:08:03,800 --> 00:08:05,600 Excuse me? Really?! 213 00:08:05,602 --> 00:08:06,735 But, Garnet -- 214 00:08:06,737 --> 00:08:08,970 put your buts away, Steven. 215 00:08:08,972 --> 00:08:11,172 We're not wanted here, so let's just leave. 216 00:08:11,174 --> 00:08:13,642 But, Garnet, we'll have to move all the bubbles. 217 00:08:13,644 --> 00:08:15,610 A-and what about Steven's things? 218 00:08:15,612 --> 00:08:18,780 Man! Ugh. I kind of liked it here. 219 00:08:18,782 --> 00:08:20,015 Uh... 220 00:08:20,017 --> 00:08:22,784 Mission accomplished! 221 00:08:22,786 --> 00:08:24,619 Uh, you can turn the camera o-- 222 00:08:24,621 --> 00:08:25,854 ahhhhh. 223 00:08:25,856 --> 00:08:27,689 That's right. I did it. 224 00:08:27,691 --> 00:08:29,824 Thanks to me, the gems are gone forever. 225 00:08:29,826 --> 00:08:31,526 Mm. That's too bad. 226 00:08:31,528 --> 00:08:33,795 Now you won't have anything to blog about anymore. 227 00:08:33,797 --> 00:08:35,797 Come on, dude. I'm trying to finish the movie. 228 00:08:35,799 --> 00:08:37,198 Well, this relates to your movie. 229 00:08:37,200 --> 00:08:38,867 You said it yourself -- 230 00:08:38,869 --> 00:08:41,202 the gems cause all the weird stuff in Beach City, 231 00:08:41,204 --> 00:08:44,205 so now that they're gone, there'll be no more weird stuff. 232 00:08:44,207 --> 00:08:46,007 No. 233 00:08:46,009 --> 00:08:47,809 No! 234 00:08:47,811 --> 00:08:49,711 What have I done?! 235 00:08:49,713 --> 00:08:52,280 Ronaldo: What had I done? 236 00:08:52,282 --> 00:08:54,282 I done bad. 237 00:08:54,284 --> 00:08:57,052 I made a terrible mistake. 238 00:08:57,054 --> 00:08:59,788 [ Peedee panting ] This -- this is -- [ Panting ] 239 00:08:59,790 --> 00:09:01,823 This is a matter of weird and death! 240 00:09:01,825 --> 00:09:04,125 Peedee: I'm going... As fast as I can! 241 00:09:04,127 --> 00:09:05,226 [ Panting ] 242 00:09:05,228 --> 00:09:08,296 Crystal gems! You have to stay! 243 00:09:08,298 --> 00:09:10,665 Every messed-up consequence of your presence 244 00:09:10,667 --> 00:09:13,034 gives me reason to wake up in the morning! 245 00:09:13,036 --> 00:09:16,237 Without you, my blog doesn't stand a chance! 246 00:09:16,239 --> 00:09:18,807 I'm too late! What have I done?! 247 00:09:18,809 --> 00:09:21,009 I've made Beach City... 248 00:09:21,011 --> 00:09:22,210 Normal! 249 00:09:22,212 --> 00:09:24,012 [ Sobbing ] 250 00:09:24,014 --> 00:09:27,749 I've broken my promise to the city! 251 00:09:27,751 --> 00:09:29,884 And to myself! 252 00:09:29,886 --> 00:09:31,086 [ Sobbing ] 253 00:09:31,088 --> 00:09:32,253 [ Moans ] 254 00:09:32,255 --> 00:09:34,222 [ Sighs ] 255 00:09:34,224 --> 00:09:36,257 You're still here! 256 00:09:36,259 --> 00:09:39,027 Please don't leave! I was wrong! 257 00:09:39,029 --> 00:09:41,563 Stay and keep this town weird! 258 00:09:41,565 --> 00:09:43,598 Ronaldo: I had no idea 259 00:09:43,600 --> 00:09:46,868 how this Crystal Gem would respond to my plea. 260 00:09:46,870 --> 00:09:49,738 The answer will shock you. 261 00:09:49,740 --> 00:09:50,839 Okay. 262 00:09:50,841 --> 00:09:52,741 Haaaaaaaaaaaah! 263 00:09:52,743 --> 00:09:57,278 Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! 264 00:09:57,280 --> 00:09:59,781 [ Sobbing ] 265 00:09:59,783 --> 00:10:02,183 [ Laughing maniacally ] 266 00:10:02,185 --> 00:10:06,588 I had skillfully negotiated for the gems to stay. 267 00:10:06,590 --> 00:10:09,057 Perhaps I have a future in... 268 00:10:09,059 --> 00:10:11,392 Intergalactic diplomacy? 269 00:10:11,394 --> 00:10:13,294 [ Laughs ] 270 00:10:13,296 --> 00:10:14,929 In the end, 271 00:10:14,931 --> 00:10:18,133 I suppose the gems really do save Beach City -- 272 00:10:18,135 --> 00:10:20,902 from being not weird! 273 00:10:20,904 --> 00:10:23,204 Okay, peedee, I think that about wraps it up. 274 00:10:23,206 --> 00:10:24,973 Good job with the camera, bro. 275 00:10:24,975 --> 00:10:26,040 Peedee: Oh. Thanks. 276 00:10:26,042 --> 00:10:28,810 [ Digital music playing ] 277 00:10:29,979 --> 00:10:31,913 That was very poorly edited. 278 00:10:31,915 --> 00:10:34,249 Were we really gonna leave Beach City? 279 00:10:34,251 --> 00:10:37,418 No. I just wanted him to get that camera out of my face. 280 00:10:37,420 --> 00:10:40,088 I wonder how many people have seen this thing. 281 00:10:40,090 --> 00:10:42,423 Oh. [ Laughs ] I think we're the only ones. 282 00:10:42,425 --> 00:10:44,092 See? 283 00:10:44,094 --> 00:10:45,326 Hmm. 284 00:10:46,762 --> 00:10:48,329 Click. 285 00:10:48,331 --> 00:10:53,301 ♪ If I could begin to be 286 00:10:53,303 --> 00:10:55,970 ♪ half of what you think of me 287 00:10:55,972 --> 00:10:58,339 ♪ I could do about anything 288 00:10:58,341 --> 00:11:03,645 ♪ I could even learn how to love like you ♪